Forgiveness...It SUCKS!

For the past 2  years now I have chosen a word of the year (woty) before January each year.  Last year (2015) my word was freedom.  That word played out huge in my life last year.  For this year, I felt called to the word brave.  

Sitting in church this morning my word of the year hit me like a freaking sack of bricks.  I've spent this year with this topic of forgiveness coming up again and again and again.  And I'm going to own the fact that I have wrestled really hard with it.  It is a concept that I frankly do not like.  And it's a concept that I have a super hard time following through with.  

At church today the message was about forgiveness and it really hit me hard.  The following are what I took as far as notes go:

Holy guacamole batman!  The part that REALLY hit me was the whole idea that "true, real, authentic forgiveness takes time.  You keep forgiving, again and again and again, until there is no record of wrong."  

This was the first time that I feel like someone has told me flat out that forgiveness is NOT forgetting!  I don't have to forget what has happened to me.  Choosing to forgive does not mean I am excusing what happened to me or pretending it was fine.  I also DO NOT have to ever reconcile with the person who hurt me so tremendously.  Forgiveness does not require reconciliation.  Instead I get to simply choose to forgive because forgiveness only requires me!